Back from the Southwest

We had a GREAT vacation. A quick review of the highlights of our whirlwind tour:


LAS VEGAS STRIP
A jewelry box full of rhinestones that someone has turned into an ashtray. A kaleidoscope of big hair, airbrushed, tight faces and fake boobs, together with oxygen-tank-sucking octogenarians with fingers planted firmly on the slot machine buttons.

We saw Zumanity by Cirque du Soleil. Well-done? Yes. Bawdy? Absolutely. Sexual? Slightly. Risqué? Not really. Unless you consider boobies and dirty jokes risqué. No gimps were harmed in the making of this show.



ROUTE 66
Stopped for lunch at the Road Kill Cafe in Seligman, Arizona. Their slogan--You Kill It, We Grill It. Not a vegetarian haven--even the grilled cheese sandwich was made with lard. Thank god for the salad bar.



GRAND CANYON
Absolutely grand, indeed. The early pioneers must have struggled to get here. We struggled ourselves with the brand of tourist attracted to the Grand Canyon Railway tour we took. Despite the bitchy, crochety old people on the train and the ADD-afflicted tour bus driver who told us more about herself than about the Canyon, the big hole in the ground was very impressive. I had had enough of the cheesy hotel brunch by the end of this bit of the trip. My advice? Skip the tour and do it on your own. The cowboy crooning on the train made me understand why so many were scalped back in the day.



SEDONA, ARIZONA
Although hyped up as over-touristy and overpriced, this was the highlight of our trip. We took a "Pink Jeep Tour", which had us bouncing over red rock formations and nearly knocked the chimichanga right out of me. You can go on meditation field trips to "magnetic vortices", and shop at the Metaphysical Supermarket. It's no wonder real estate prices here have skyrocketed.



BRYCE CANYON
After a long drive through Navajo country into Utah, we spent a day at Bryce, full of its famous hoodoo rock formations. Gorge-ous.



ZION NATIONAL PARK
Stayed at the Pioneer Lodge Motel, which was much better than expected. Good food, great views, easy access to tacky souvenirs and a free shuttle into the park. The park itself was wondrous, and I'd like to go back when I can hike some of it.


It was a great trip overall, bookended by some of the most breathtaking views I've ever seen in America on one side, and some of the nastiest tourists I've seen on the other. Like all places, the good and the bad intermingle, but in the end, it was an unforgettable experience, and introduced me to places I'd like to go back to again and again.

Check out our family album for more pics.