We are family

A New York minute

2009-06-14T18:39:00.003-04:00

OK, I know it's been a while. But I have been busy adopting a second child, running a business, and, well... documenting all of it on Facebook. Sorry, Blog.

Anyway, we took the kids to NYC a couple of weekends ago on a very quick trip, and encountered a quintessential New York moment. It seemed a shame not to share it.

We were standing on Broadway, somewhere in Soho, and Dennis had just run into a Duane Reade to buy some size-6 diapers for Aaron. I was left outside on the busy sidewalk with my two strollers-full of purchases--and the two boys.

Suddenly, a door nestled in between the shops, which evidently leads to upper-floor apartments, burst open. A team of paramedics quickly shuffled out of the door, wheeling a disheveled man in his early 20s onto the sidewalk in some kind of wheelchair apparatus. The man was unkempt, unshaven, and undoubtedly unbathed. His wide eyes and open mouth were overshadowed by his claw-like hands, contorted into a pose reminiscent of a T-Rex toy we'd gotten in some fast-food meal.

Mesmerized by the sight of this poor soul, we barely noticed when the first paramedic, walking with his back to us, bumped into Koby and his stroller. The EMT turned around and saw Koby, mouth agape. Pausing briefly, he leaned down and at Koby's eye level, said in an almost blasé, if not slightly sarcastic tone, "Hey kid, stay in school, don't do drugs." Then he regained his cadence with the rest of the team, and the wheelchair-man was shoved into the back of a waiting ambulance.

The sidewalks still filled with people, moving up and down like the city's lifeblood through its shopping arteries and veins, had barely missed a beat. Koby looked up at me and asked me to explain what the man meant. While the message was easy to convey, I also wanted him to appreciate the New-Yorkedness of it. That day will come.

Bad language

2008-11-18T20:03:00.003-05:00

Well, I knew it was coming eventually. And I supposed this might be the year that it would happen, and happen it did.

Round the breakfast table, which is in itself a crossroads of chaos and cocoa puffs in the morning with Koby, nearly six, and Aaron, freshly two. Amidst all of the other things happening simultaneously--Aaron getting covered in things I didn't even realize I'd given him, Koby pontificating on the importance of following class rules and the consequences (a new word) of not doing so, and my coffee getting cold as I ran for the seventh paper towel... Had I packed Aaron's lunch? Taken my Paxil? Anyway...

Just as the routine was winding down and I felt peace creeping back into the dining room, like a ray of light after a tropical downpour, Koby said in a 'playground' kind of tone, "Do you know what a bad word is?"

Oh, I've heard this one a thousand times. Koby went through a phase when he was four where he starting realizing there were 'bad' words. He didn't abuse them, except in constantly asking us "Hey, do you know what a bad word is? [pause] "Stupid!" And then he'd look at us with a mixture of feigned shock at his own utterance, barely covering a mischievous grin.

Yes, it was always 'stupid' or 'hate' or some other word that we, in wielding our parental powers over the pre-schooler, had started to instill in him, just so he would know better. We are careful not to use foul language at home, and god knows his upscale former daycare in Brookline would have been more likely to teach him a word of Spanish, Italian, Russian, or Hebrew before he'd learn anything R-rated.

But now, now Koby was in kindergarten. Real kindergarten in a real public school in Boston. That's where these bad seeds sprout.

So when he asked me the question this morning, "Hey, do you know what a bad word is?" I thought it would be a slight upgrade from 'stupid'--'idiot', perhaps? Then Koby opened his mouth, looked straight into my eyes, and said, "Bitch."

And all I could think was, this is surreal. This is my little baby Koby! He still watches cartoons and sucks his fingers. And today he aged ten years right in front of my eyes. "Bitch." I couldn't believe it.

You know what comes next. "Where did you learn that?!" Because I know it couldn't have happened at home. Thank goodness Koby is still angelic enough to actually tell me, "Michael (a classmate) told me."

"Well," I said, "that's a bad word, and you shouldn't say that to anybody. If you call somebody that, it'll really hurt their feelings. It's super-bad." 'Super' was my most powerful emphasis word for Koby--I hoped it would do its job.

He nodded and said he understood. I told him if I heard him say it, there'd be consequences. Then I asked myself, exactly why was this so upsetting? Why should simple little words carry so much weight? I suppose it's because we believe they do, and so they do.

He's still my baby Koby, but the next time he asks me if I know what a bad word is, my answer will be, "Yes. I know ALL of them. Thank you." We'll just wait and see.

Don't let it bug you

2008-09-23T22:17:00.004-04:00

OK. This isn't going to be pleasant. In fact, you may find this post crass, or in bad taste in general. I can't help it. I need to talk about what I was forced to endure today.

Anyone who knows me and Dennis well will attest to the fact that Dennis is, shall we say, a teentsy bit OCD about cleanliness. Think Desperate Housewives' Bree on steroids.

We had to take Aaron down to southern Mass for a bio-family visit today. This would have been fine, if it weren't for the fact that we had been told that Aaron has come back from these visits in the past with, well, a bug. Several bugs, actually. In his hair.

That's all Dennis had to hear.

Before we left our house this morning, he had plotted the whole thing out:

1. We take Aaron to the visit.

2. As soon as Aaron is brought back to the car, a surgical hat goes onto his head, being careful to avoid as much contact between his hair and the rest of the car environment and us as possible. (Poor little thing.)

3. We ourselves also don surgical hats (with baseball caps over them, to make ourselves look oh-so-inconspicuous), and encourage Aaron to keep his on his head for the 50-minute ride by pointing to ourselves and saying, "Look! Funny hat! Funny hat!"

4. We drive back to Boston at lightning speed, hoping not to get stopped for (a) speeding, and (b) looking ridiculous behind the wheel of a car.

5. We stop at Walgreen's to buy RID lice shampoo. Why wouldn't Dennis have done this ahead of time? He was so paranoid about a random bug making its way onto his scalp (I'm scratching my head just thinking about it now!) that he went inside Walgreen's wearing the surgical hat to buy the shampoo. I can't imagine what the sales clerk thought.

6. We arrive at home, run up to the second floor, strip off our clothes, and all 3 jump into the bathtub, where we sit for 10 minutes with lice shampoo on our heads.

7. We rinse, towel-dry, and Dennis throws our clothing into the washing machine and hits the SANITARY WASH button (2 hours in hot water). He only ruined one garment in the process.

We are happily bug free, and even better, my hair is remarkably silky smooth.

Aaron's transition

2008-09-10T09:38:00.002-04:00

OK, folks. Here it is. BEFORE:

AFTER:

Now I know that some of you may actually prefer the longer hairdo. But as a child of the 60s and 70s who grew up with a "Dutch Boy" cut, which contributed to my often being mistaken for a girl and god knows how many hours of therapy, I have my reasons.

The long road home

2008-09-09T21:31:00.002-04:00

Aaron had a hard day today. After bouncing back and forth between our home and his foster home for the past month, he finally landed in his new nest, here with us. He cried and shrieked for nearly 2 hours solid while his foster family was here. Very different from Koby's transition here 3 years ago, which involved no crying at all.

After his foster family left, he settled down almost immediately, and is enjoying a long night's sleep tonight. It's 9:30 and I am exhausted myself. New pics of Aaron with his new and improved boy-style haircut, and pics of Koby in his role as 'big brother' to follow.

Czech it out

2008-08-28T05:17:00.004-04:00

All right, I know "czech it out" is an overused phrase here in Prague. It's on T-shirts everywhere, but who could blame them? The bad pun is overshadowed by the absolute beauty that completely surrounds you--both architecture and people. I'd definitely like to spend some more time here in the future.

Ich bin kein Berliner

2008-08-26T15:45:00.003-04:00

No, I'm not a Berliner, or a pastry, or anything remotely close. But we did have a fun time riding the trains around the city, walking for miles and taking in all different parts of the city in all kinds of weather. There's certainly a New York-ish (in European terms) feeling about the city, compared to other places we've been.

I can't quite figure out what my fascination with East Berlin, the DDR, and the Wall is, but I certainly liked going to all the touristy "Checkpoint Charlie" type things. Any of you who knows me well knows that I dearly want the signboard in this photo to reflect my reality rather than just my vacation.

I suppose I can call it "practice."

The whole city seems very alive, and we really only saw a small, touristy slice of it. I did find this ad rather amusing. In case it's too small to make out, it's an anti-AIDS campaign promoting condom use for Germans (the potato) traveling overseas (gee, where do they grow such tropical fruits? Hmm, Thailand??).

I mean, I've seen MANY Germans in that part of the world, in those parts of town. I'm just glad that they recognize this as an issue in the Vaterland.

Next is Prague!

Fußball? Nein. Limonade? Ja!

2008-08-24T09:52:00.003-04:00

This was one of the first lines from my ALM German 1 textbook, circa 1980. Luckily, the German I learned in two years of high school and one semester in college has somehow come out to help me in times of need.

Upon our arrival in Frankfurt, we hopped a couple of trains to Bacharach, a picture-postcard-perfect town on the Rhine.

From Bacharach we headed by ferry up the Rhine to St. Goar, taking in the sights of all the various castles along the way, as well as the famous Lorelei rock. At St. Goar we visited Rheinfels Castle.

From St. Goar we took the train to Köln, and stopped to see the cathedral. From there we got right back on the train and headed to Dormagen/Zons, the sight of the wedding festivities. Koby was a "flower boy", and was appropriately dressed up for the occasion.

The wedding was beautiful—we expected no less from project manager Rebecca and engineer Felix. We had a fantastic time, but finally had to leave the festivities around midnight, when the disco portion of the evening was just getting underway.

We just arrived in Berlin, in the rain, and are looking forward to exploring the city over the next couple of days.

Where did half the summer go?

2008-07-17T21:11:00.004-04:00

I know the summers in New England are short, but I can't believe this one is half over already. Here are the highlights so far.

We went to Ohio in early June to see family.

Took in the annual Pride parade in Boston...

Koby graduated from Pre-Kindergarten at Mattahunt...

We hosted a bachelorette party for Rebecca as she visited from Germany...

Went camping in Freeport, at our usual haunt...

And hosted a few playdates.

And that's the slow part of the season. Just wait for the rest of it!

Bathroom clean-up

2008-07-17T20:58:00.004-04:00

OK, so I realize I haven't written anything in nearly 2 months. I blame Facebook completely. I've been so busy getting and receiving Flair, rating movies, and "networking" that I haven't spent any time in the blogosphere. I also blame Netflix, which I joined around the same time. How did I live without it?

Well anyway, while I was in Japan, I left Dennis here with Father James, flown out specially from Ohio, and Koby, to gut and redo the second-floor bathroom. One indicator that I was NOT here for the construction is that I definitely would have taken BEFORE pics to compare with the after ones. No such luck.

Combing through my iPhoto, this is what I came up with: Felix, Rebecca and Koby peering out the door, just enough to reveal the maroon porcelain (tub, sink and toilet), the maroon floor tile, the generic white cabinets, and pink old-lady wall tiles.

The end result is a look I like to call "gay man staying in executive suite at 5-star hotel".

Complete with stone-tiled shower area...

...and a toilet that'll clean you better than you clean yourself.

Tokyo, hisashiburi ni

2008-05-25T19:58:00.003-04:00

I'm visiting Tokyo for the first time in two years. That's a new record for me, I think, since at least the early 90s.

I'll post more as soon as sort out what's going on in my life here, which sometimes feels as tangled and confusing as this map of the Tokyo subway system.

Pieces of April

2008-04-27T16:49:00.005-04:00

I can't believe it's been over a month since my last post. Life has been busy, as usual. In early April Sally and I trekked down to TESOL in NYC for a 3-day "family reunion" of some kind, posing as a teachers' conference. It was great seeing everyone, though afterwards Sally and I returned to our respective homes to "sleep the sleep of the dead."

One of the events was a cocktail party in the Rainbow Room, which offered one of the best views of New York I'd ever seen. The cocktails probably helped...

Since TESOL life has been about two things: work, and planning for the summer. So far, we've got a quick trip to Ohio (early June); Québec city and its 400th anniversary celebration (late July); a visit from some of my Ohio family (mid-August); and Rebecca's wedding in Germany, with a tour around Berlin, Prague and Reykjavik (late August). We'll try to get a few camping trips in there as well.

Last week we had another little brush with the realities of life when someone smashed our front passenger window and stole our GPS out of the car. Nothing else was gone. I suppose they took it to sell and buy drugs. I seriously doubt they were planning an intricate road trip and were simply frustrated with using Mapquest.

Oh well. Nobody was hurt, but when it happens in your own driveway you can't help but feel violated... Needless to say, we won't be leaving the replacement machine in the window overnight.

Savez-vous tricoter?

2008-03-15T08:11:00.002-04:00

The last month I've been concert-crazy: we saw k.d. lang (phenomenal), Pink Martini (amazing), and last night, Tricot Machine (extraordinaire). Tricot Machine is a great new group from Québec who have raced up the charts with their self-titled debut album.

They played at the opening gala of the Quinzaine de la Francophonie, a two-week festival celebrating the French language all over New England.

We didn't get the fully orchestrated effect of their indie-folk-pop tunes last night, as they played only with piano and a few percussion instruments. But they sounded great, and even better, I got to chat with them after the show. Woo-hoo!

Check out their single, L'ours:

Snow time like the present

2008-03-15T07:53:00.002-04:00

We have learned to embrace the winter. We took advantage of a snowy Saturday to romp through the Arboretum with Ben, Anh, Steven, Nicky, and the kids. George and Koby had a great time playing together. What's the opposite of snow angels, I wonder?

Here are the devoted uncles, with their trusty steed Elsie.

And here are the Rhode Island Pipers... a handsome group.

A few weeks later, we went up to Sunday River in Maine for some ski action. Koby was in great form on the slopes, as part of the "Mogul Munchkins" training group.

Dennis and I are wearing our matching Swiss Miss hats. Just makes me want to yodel.

2008-02-07T18:48:00.000-05:00

We spent last weekend in Montréal, our future home (hopefully). We felt we needed to find out what it was really like in the winter. All of our friends have been saying, "No, surely not! How can you live in Montréal? The winters are so horrible!" Well, we did drive into about a foot of snow upon our arrival. But we have that in Boston, too. However, in Boston, we don't have trucks hauling away the snow as part of the standard déneigement procedures.

The snow didn't keep us from having a lovely lunch at Juliette et Chocolat, where I warmed my bones with a Soleil épicé—a spicy cocktail of warm, dark chocolate, cardamom, cinnamon, cayenne pepper, and Bailey's. Mmmmmm.

Nor did it stop us from visiting the Biodome, outside the Olympic Stadium.

Or sledding at Parc Mont-Royal.

We're looking forward to the next visit. The winter's nice, but I'm sure spring is even better.

Feeling natsukashii

2008-01-25T21:36:00.000-05:00

Some friends sent an old video from our Korea days, which prompted me to search for ones even further back in my Asian past. Here's a Japanese song from the 80s that, if you've known me for long and have seen me around a microphone, you've probably heard.

I don't have an Akiko Kobayashi wig in my basement collection yet, but I will be on the lookout...

Gimme five

2008-01-13T15:24:00.000-05:00

Koby turned five last week! We had an ENORMOUS Buzz Lightyear birthday cake, most of which I had to freeze, because I didn't know that a "half-sheet" size cake would feed 40 people.

I took cupcakes to his "big-boy" school the next day. I spent an hour with 14 four- and five-year-olds. I have no idea how Mrs. Lydon does it. God bless 'er.

Koby loved ALL the toys he got. But today he decided to wear his new ski goggles & helmet so he could be a robot, and help Dennis clean up the yard. We'll see if that works when he's eight.

Filipinos on ice—that's nice

2007-12-26T09:11:00.000-05:00

Among our other Christmastime adventures in the greater Toronto metropolitan area last week, we got almost the whole group up on ice skates down at the City Hall ice rink. My sister-in-law Ann offered lessons for the erstwhile ice cadets.

Dennis, somewhat surprisingly, took to the ice like a fish to water—icy water.

Koby loved the experience as well, which gives me hope that Canadian passports might be a reality someday! Now that we're back in Boston, we'll be hitting the Frog Pond on a regular basis.

It's all downhill from here

2007-12-19T08:16:00.000-05:00

Koby was afraid of snow when he was two. I guess he outgrew that. We took him on our first sledding trip together last weekend. The hill wasn't treacherous, but a decent way to start things off. If he's going to be Canadian, this is something he has to enjoy doing!

Down in the DR

2007-12-19T08:00:00.000-05:00

Well, I made it down to the Dominican Republic last week, where I was greeted by Olga—tropical storm Olga, that is. She dumped her unseasonable moisture all over Santiago, where I was scheduled to give a presentation (for Cengage). With over 150 invitees, we were lucky to get the 20 people we did.

The weather did bring on a craving for comfort food, which was plentiful. My gracious hosts Johann and Manuel took me to a highway-side cafe for some yummy DR breakfast treats: mangú (smashed plantains topped with vinegar-simmered onions) and fried cheese—all washed down with the best organic coffee.

After the presentation and the long drive back to Santo Domingo, we stopped at "La Cool Vita," a drive-thru bar, where they pass you bottles of El Presidente wrapped in little brown paper bags out a window.

The next day I gave a presentation to about 120 teachers at the Instituto Cultural Dominico-Americano (ICDA). Before that, however, Johann made sure I got a little local culture in with a visit to the Zona Colonial and all the "New World of Christopher Columbus" sites. Very impressive.

I resisted buying a hat, but next time I might change my mind.

Check this out

2007-11-15T16:12:00.000-05:00

Our little company has received its first check (2 checks, actually). I guess this makes us an official business!

This, along with the fact that we have 3 time-zone clocks on our office wall, was enough to convince my husband that we are legit.

Far from scary

2007-11-04T14:46:00.000-05:00

Here are Koby, Jacob, and Andrew, getting ready for a night of trick-or-treating en masse. Koby was thrilled to have friends with him to run through the dark streets. Ninety percent of the proceeds from that night went to the Boston Medical Center "Fatten the Nurses" campaign in the step-down telemmetry unit.

Comme il pleut dans la ville

2007-11-04T14:30:00.000-05:00

It rained and rained the majority of the time we were in Montréal last weekend. We rented a well-positioned 3-bedroom flat right on rue Ste-Catherine Est, in the heart of Le Village. We stocked up on staples at Métro supermarket, and spent a good part of the weekend eating cheese and baguettes over some bottles of vin rouge. We still got in a little shopping and playing.

We had lunch at this fast-food Lebanese place. Despite the dishes featured on the billboard, I still chose the vegetarian plate.

On Sunday we had brunch at the lovely Juliette & Chocolat, on rue St-Denis. They're all about chocolate, as the name suggests, and lovely crêpes. Koby pretended to be a waiter with Ben and Anh.

This was one of the many strange faces that Jason made over the weekend. If you want to know why, you'll have to ask him yourself.

Sunday afternoon we drove around different neighborhoods, trying to get a better sense of what type of area we might like to live in. Looks like visits to the Grande Ville des Fêtes are going to start being a regular diversion.

I just adore a penthouse view...

2007-10-23T20:10:00.000-04:00

We spent a glorious 4 days in New York City last week with our dear friend Francis. Francis gave us a tour of the Bloomberg HQ, and showed us some fantastic places to eat... Vietnamese, Japanese, Filipino, Thai, Indian, Mexican. So yes, we basically just ate, walked, ate, walked... and sometimes we rode the subway--Koby's favorite part of the trip.

Dennis enjoyed being able to get some good Filipino food at a place called Pistahan in the East Village. We even got them to make a vegetarian version of Bicol Express. We had to do something to get Francis up from his 28-inch waist.

We got to see Dennis's brother Ojie as well, which was an extra treat. I don't think I'd seen him in about 6 years! We wrestled him into a cheap Ukrainian barber shop after this photo was taken--for a mercy haircut.

Koby and Dennis went up the Empire State Building while I was busy at work, attending meetings at a publisher.

After my meetings, however, we bumped into Olympic gold medalist Nadia Comaneci, Taxi's Marilu Henner, and Omarosa of The Apprentice, who were selling hot dogs for charity outside Penn Station. Ah, the D list, how it does bite! They were perfectly lovely.

A pirate's life for him

2007-10-01T17:26:00.000-04:00

My friend Meredith came over to visit, and we spent a couple of days (and late nights) painting a pirate mural on Koby's bedroom wall.

The far wall over his bed now features a HUGE treasure map, including Meredith making a cameo appearance as Meredith the Mermaid.

And on the other wall over the dresser, a pirate ship complete with Koby at the helm, supported by hairy-chested pirates Papa and Tatay.

Let's hope it stays interesting enough for us NOT to need to paint it again for several years! It'll be harder to execute the next mural as we get older and arthritic.

Ain't life Grand?

2007-10-01T15:40:00.001-04:00

I just escaped being empaneled in a grand jury of Suffolk County Superior Court. The commitment would have lasted 4 days a week for the next 3 months. Don't get me wrong--I'm probably one of the few people who thinks jury duty is interesting and am even willing to endure the sacrifices this "civic responsibility" brings forth. But not making enough to pay for my mortgage, car, etc., for the next 3 months sounds about as unappealing as the government cheese I received in 1985--the taste of which still lingers in my memory.

So after months of worry about how I may have to completely abandon any sense of scheduling flexibility, I am once again FREE to enjoy myself without the thought of sitting in a room of my peers, eating donuts and drinking bad coffee, doodling caricatures of the DA in my notebook. What a relief.

Photo album updated

2007-09-22T11:22:00.001-04:00

I just spent my Saturday morning updating our long out-of-date Family Photo Album. So if you want to see more of what we've been up to from, say, November 2006 to September 2007, go to the link to our album on the right.

Way down in Dixie

2007-09-11T09:23:00.000-04:00

Just got back from Gatlinburg, Tennessee, where my sister Rebekah and my new brother-in-law Ben got married. It was an outdoor ceremony in Cades Cove, part of the Smoky Mountains National Park.

The views were amazing.

Koby and Gillian had fun exploring.

Boots were worn by many (but not all).

We even made our way to Dollywood the next day, where Koby, Dennis and Grandpa rode the teacups...or as my brother refers to them, the D-cups.

Koby and I rode the flying elephants, which proves my old saying: "Me in Dollywood? Yeah. When elephants fly!"

Mother and her parasol look almost natural in front of Ye Olde Soape Shoppe.

And finally, pancakes were enjoyed by all. Hard to miss them when every third building is a pancake restaurant.

End of the road

2007-09-03T13:59:00.000-04:00

Dear Readers, we are happy to report that we have safely arrived in Boston after 5 days of driving, 9 stops for diesel, 7 deep-fried meals, 6 wi-fi-stops, 3 buffets, and only 2 truck-scrapes (the second one was a stop sign in the depths of Roslindale).

The last two days did feature a few attractions that we thought we should share. The first was the Flintstone House--a private residence situated on a long, curvy road outside Concord, OH. Hint: Do not attempt the road with anything larger than a 22'. We feel lucky to have escaped unscathed in our 26-footer.

In Austinburg, OH, near the Pennsylvania line, we saw a "Large Rocking Chair."

We made it to Aunt Elsie's by 7:15pm, ate dinner, slept blissfully, knowing that Sunday would be our last day on the road. Rebecca had a hard time releasing her driving grip, however...

On the way down Highway 12 in upstate NY, we toured the new wind farms of Lowville. Apparently all this power makes its way hundreds of miles down to NYC.

Finally, this roadside attraction, while blurry, was one of the BEST ones we saw along the way!

So, we made it. Many thanks to all the friends and family who supported us with food, wine, showers, and shelter throughout the entire trip. We all learned lots of new things both inside and outside the cab of the Penske. And despite the many notices we read on the backs of semis looking for new drivers, I think we're all quite happy staying right where we are... for now.

A brief respite in quiet Ohio

2007-09-01T09:05:00.001-04:00

Dear Faithful Readers, my apologies for shirking my blogging duties on Friday morning. Thursday had been, shall we say, eventful? Despite our best attempts to get out of the Greater Milwaukee area at a decent time, our innocent stop to fill the diesel tank resulted in an unforeseen delay… At a gas station near Elm Grove, WI, I was trying to maneuver the Penske out of the tight space and knicked the gas pump. I was expecting to get out and see a fountain of diesel fuel spouting into the air, but gladly saw only a mildly beat-up pump.

The police came to file a report. The officer was very nice, and filled out the necessary paperwork for the gas station to collect from our Penske insurance (we will be getting our money’s worth, that’s for sure). I was a bit too distraught to photo-document the event, though Rebecca did. Maybe someday those images will make their way here.

After our rather auspicious start to the day, we spent the whole day driving, and didn’t reach Smithville, Ohio until around 10pm. We were all getting VERY tired of the Penske, and looked forward to bed, and to a day of smoother rides.

Friday we spent the day in my old stomping grounds, and toured Amish country around Wayne and Holmes counties.

In between our shopping for locally-made cheese and trail bologna, we took time to see the world’s largest cuckoo clock.

From here we went to visit the world’s largest Amish buggy, a.k.a. the Amish version of the Penske.

As we enjoyed the idyllic landscape and its slower pace of life, we tried not to think about our fate the next day—the return to the highway in the great yellow beast.

In the heart of the Midwest

2007-08-30T10:46:00.000-04:00

Okay, folks. We need a QUICK update, because yesterday was a LONG driving day, which included navigating the Penske through downtown Minneapolis. We've got to hit the road this morning and head on to Ohio!

Yesterday was quite eventful, and it's a shame I don't have more time to expound on the beauty of the "world's largest twine ball rolled by one man".

It's a bit hard to see, as it's encased in its own little plexiglass pavilion. No one seemed to be around to open the museum for us, but we did find a guest book in the large mailbox in front of it.

Not much else is going on in Darwin, MN (at least we didn't find it). But we did visit the Twineball Antiques shop, where we bought commemorative T-shirts.

Back on the road, much work was accomplished (believe it or not) with our double-socket cigarette-lighter laptop plug. Just learn to ignore the bumps in the road.

After making our way into the heart of downtown Minneapolis, we popped out to pay tribute to Mary Tyler Moore...

...and rewarded ourselves for getting out of the city in the 26' foot in one piece by spending an hour in the Mall of America.

We did have a couple of other planned sites to see on our way. "Large Chicken" was not impressive enough to stop, though we saluted it from the highway. "Another Giant Mouse with Cheese" also didn't merit a side trip (though we saw it through the window). However, we did stop for Paul Bunyan and Babe. Who wouldn't?

So now we're off again. What lies in store? Tune in tomorrow to find out.

On the road, you betchah!

2007-08-29T08:40:00.000-04:00

The TRUCK! Although most people are thrilled when they're upgraded at a car rental place, we were slightly stunned to find out our 22' Penske truck had been substituted with a 26' one. Oh well, perhaps size doesn't matter after all.

With all of Rebecca's things packed in the Penske, we were ready to head out! But not before stopping at the Siouxland Buffalo place, which features the best of the buffalo: meat...

...and moccasins. Here we see the backroom slaughter-boy-turned-shoe-salesman luring Sally into a sale.

After a quick stop for lunch at the Beehive Cafe in Reynolds, ND, where we donated $5 to the local pull-tab industry, we were ready to head down to Fargo and across the border...

...into Minnesota. You betchah.

First stop in the Land o' Lakes? Rothsay.

Rothsay is the home of the world's LARGEST "Booming" Prairie Chicken. (I wonder where the second largest one is.)

But our fowl play didn't stop there. Next we stumbled upon the world's LARGEST Crow in Belgrade, MN.

In case you don't believe me, here's the proof:

And after a night at Rebecca's friend Dean's house in Willmar, MN, we boarded the Penske and headed out once more.

Let the adventure begin!

2007-08-27T22:33:00.000-04:00

Here we go! Happy travelers Sally and Chris (newly blond) sit and await takeoff on one of their three flights from Boston to Grand Forks, North Dakota.

As we started our descent into Grand Forks Airport, we noted the ND topography—all laid out in perfect patchwork of squares, each dotted with a little farm or two.

Rebecca got right to work showing us the sights and sounds of her native area, including her cow-calling technique.

Apparently it works…

Having settled down for a lovely meal at the home of Rebecca’s sister, Karen, we were unaware that a tornado had touched down only a few miles away in Northwood, Rebecca’s hometown. The hail storm did make us wonder if we would make it through the night.

We surveyed the damage around Northwood, which included a damaged silo, a toppled trailer park, several ripped-up buildings, and dozens of cars mangled like pieces of foil.

We spent the afternoon packing up Rebecca’s things, and tomorrow we pick up the Penske truck and take our adventure on the road!

From the Icy North Atlantic

2007-08-21T14:34:00.001-04:00

I’ll post more photos and videos after we return, but at 50 cents a minute, I’m trying to limit my internet time on board! Here’s an amuse-bouche of images to start with.

Here we are, the happy cruisers, docked in Skagway, or thereabouts. Behind us is our ship, the Pacific Princess, temporary home to 684 passengers and 373 crew.

They’re lumberjacks and they’re OK. And they put on quite a cute little show.

Three of us decked out in formal wear in the dining room. The food was mostly nursing-home-haute-cuisine, meaning that it all looked great, but tasted like someone locked up the chef’s spice rack.

I found these doggies eyeing their owner as they sat in a pickup truck parked outside a local tavern in Juneau. Luckily these weren’t the ones pulling our dog sled.

One of the many chunks of ice in Glacier Bay. Come see them while they’re still here!

The White Pass & Yukon Railway was one of the highlights of the trip. Running alongside the Gold Rush Trail of 1898, this train takes you from sea level to 3000 feet in about an hour.

Les montréalais de l'avenir?

2007-08-11T16:30:00.000-04:00

Don't we look so content standing in front of a fluttering fleurdelisé? After escaping corporate America, next stop–escape America... again! Of course I gotta transform the men in my life into francophones. Alors...

Koby getting a fix

2007-08-10T15:53:00.000-04:00

Koby loves chocolate, and he loves ice cream. And having them together in Montréal is even better.

Koby hard at work

2007-08-10T15:35:00.000-04:00

OK, really this is just a cute way for me to try out posting videos to my blog using my new camcorder before hitting the road/air/sea for Alaska. And what's cuter than the Koby man? Enjoy. It's the first of many.

The Feds

2007-08-08T07:32:00.001-04:00

Just back from Montréal. It was Koby's first trip out of the US, and Dennis's first time out since we arrived in America July 2001! We had a wonderful time in the city, and are hoping to return this fall.

Fortunately I was able to get my new passport in time to make this, and several other upcoming trips. This passport is called an "also-known-as" passport. It has my old name as the "real" name in the front with my picture. Then on the very last page it has, in computerized type, the sentence: "The bearer is also known as Christopher Lee Wenger Sol Cruz."

The federal government had rejected my regular application for a new passport with name change, citing verbage from the Defense of Marriage Act. They said that they don't recognize my marriage in MA as a viable reason for having my passport name changed, and I was given two options: (1) have my name changed by court decree (this takes 3-6 months and costs $165), or (2) show evidence that I have been using my new name for FIVE YEARS. Egad.

Fortunately the GLAD website had information about others in my predicament, and suggested I try to get this AKA passport. So after weeks of calling to get an appointment at the Boston Passport Agency, 3 visits to said office, and countless hours of waiting in line, I have my shiny new passport. If I have any trouble using it beyond the simple drive over the Canadian-US border, I may have to do the whole probate-court-name-change thing and start over.

Alas, as we were driving back from Montréal last Sunday, the passports were the least of our problems. It's funny how going into Canada things were "Oh, you're going to Montréal for Divers/Cité? Great." But coming back to the land of the "free," our border agent looked in the car and demanded, "Passports." This was quickly followed by a blunt, "Where Mom?"

Not expecting this kind of question, and at first not even realizing what the agent was asking, Dennis and I looked at each other stunned. Then, the penny dropped.

"Oh," we said, smiling, "two Dads--no Mom." To this, the agent simply replied "Oh." Then he passed our documents back, and we were on our way.

Exactly what prompted this man to ask this question, I can't be sure. But to say that it annoyed and slightly enraged me is an understatement. Luckily Koby is at an age where he didn't really pick up on the whole situation. Maybe I'm just overly sensitive that he's going to wonder where his birthmother is sometime soon. But I still don't understand why this question was appropriate for an immigration officer to ask.

Then again, they are the gods, and we must simply jump at their command. One thing I know is that you NEVER talk back to an border agent.

Sure, it was an isolated incident, but I have to say that on a trip to Canada where I was already awash with fantasies of relocating to a place that builds its societal values on tolerance and respect, rather than money and fear, it made my shiny new passport sudden seem very ragged.

It's all because

2007-07-24T16:17:00.000-04:00

Another hard-hitting piece that shows how gay marriage is ruining straight America. I am at least encouraged that the issue is getting to this level of absurdity for some!

Weeping eyes

2007-07-22T13:54:00.001-04:00

Tammy Faye, you weeped a river of mascara for us. We now weep for our own loss. You were one of the only Christians in the evangelical media who showed the world the real nature of the faith--true love. You'll be missed.

Good Reads

2007-07-06T11:38:00.000-04:00

VICTORY!!

2007-06-14T20:42:00.000-04:00

In today's constitutional convention, Massachusetts lawmakers stood up and were counted: 151 against putting an anti-gay marriage amendment on the ballot for popular vote in 2008, vs. 45 for the measure. They needed 50 votes to move the issue onto the ballot.

FINALLY. Not only can MY family have a little peace of mind, but so can others who now no longer have to worry about whether they can find someone and get married "before their rights are taken away."

I spent the day at the State House, per usual. Got to shake hands with our new governor Deval Patrick (pictured above, next to MassEquality Campaign Director Marc Solomon), which was a nice little icing on an otherwise phenomenal cake.

Comment te dire adieu?

2007-05-19T14:55:00.000-04:00

That's the question on my mind, at least. As the dust settles in my new post-Thomson life, I've been to three farewell parties in the last four weeks (two of them my own), and I'm farewelled out.

My last one was the best, however. Jennifer organized a wig-fest in Maggiano's. Some of the pre-theater guests weren't very amused by us, but we certainly had a good time.

And besides, we didn't charge them anything for the show.

Lilac Sunday

2007-05-19T14:48:00.000-04:00

We enjoyed Mother's Day at the Arnold Arboretum, where they were holding their annual Lilac Sunday. It's the only day one can bring food (legally) into the park. The lilacs were nearly in full bloom, and the scent was intoxicating.

Koby enjoyed the park, seemingly oblivious to the Mother's Day factor. I have to say it's a bit weird when I hear him singing songs about mommies at home. They learn them at school to put on little presentations, and while I don't think it really affects him yet, I'm sure it will someday soon! At daycare we came to an agreement with a lesbian couple that we would shepherd their son through the daddy things, if they would take Koby under their wing for the mommy ones. It's working so far...

Con-con reconvenes June 14

2007-05-10T19:53:00.000-04:00

Lawmakers postpone gay marriage vote until at least June 14
by Associated Press, Boston Herald

Lawmakers on Wednesday postponed a vote on a proposed constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage in Massachusetts until at least June 14.

As expected, a joint session of the House and Senate convened, but quickly recessed without a vote on the amendment.

Lawmakers were scheduled to reconvene in a joint session on June 14, although it's unclear whether a vote will take place then because they could agree to postpone the debate again.

Senate President Therese Murray, D-Boston, presided over the session, which lasted less than a minute. Murray is opposed to the amendment and has said she would work to defeat it. But she also has said she would let the amendment come up for a vote.

Before it can reach the 2008 ballot, the proposed amendment needs the backing of 25 percent - or at least 50 lawmakers - in two successive sittings of the Legislature.

It won approval in the previous Legislature in January.

Those opposed and in support of gay marriage agree that based on past votes and the stated positions of incoming lawmakers, about 57 support the amendment. There are 200 lawmakers in the House and Senate.

"We feel that our votes are very solid," said Kris Mineau, president of the Massachusetts Family Institute, which collected signatures for the proposed amendment. "Let's have a vote on June 14."

Gay marriage advocates said they were pulling out all the stops to try to change votes to block the amendment from reaching the ballot, arguing the civil rights of minority groups should not be put to a public vote.

"Weve made up some ground, but we need to make up more," said Arline Isaacson, co-chair of the Massachusetts Gay and Lesbian Political Caucus. "Weve been working very hard."

My eleven-year top ten

2007-04-27T23:39:00.000-04:00

As I count down to my last 9-5 shift as a cog in the corporate machine on April 30, 2007, I am left to recount my top ten memories of the last eleven years of serfdom. In reverse order:

10. Playing the popular after-dinner game "what's your psychosis" with colleagues in Penang, Malaysia
9. Riding a camel, smoking a hookah, and belly dancing in Dubai
8. Playing "who looks the gayest" with a group of straight colleagues at Telephone Bar in Patpong, Bangkok
7. Enjoying fresh hot chocolate and churros while traipsing over cobblestones in Coyoacan, Mexico City
6. Being able to compartmentalize my past and create new relationships with my former homes of Seoul and Tokyo
5. Watching Bruce Rogers nearly wet himself in Vancouver as John Lowe told the "peanut" story for the 38th time
4. Shaking a string of bones as a member of an impromptu ensemble of percussionists at a house party in an hacienda in Manila
3. Attending a ritualistic candomblé macumba in Sao Paulo, Brazil
2. Belting out 80s British invasion hits in a karaoke box in London
1. Showing colleagues and friends from around the world pictures of my soon-to-be son at a TESOL conference

What do the next eleven years have to offer? We'll just have to see...

Ostara by any other name

2007-04-08T09:55:00.000-04:00

Whatever you call it: Easter, Eostre, Ostara, the celebrations all share a common core. Rabbits and eggs. Fertility and rebirth of the earth. I thought it would be interesting to find some really vernal-equinox-inspired dish to make for the holiday. I ended up learning a lot about Hot Cross Buns, which originally were made to symbolize the equality of night and day at this point in the calendar, and which were considered so pagan that they were banned by churches for centuries--even though Christians in England continued to eat them as paganism and new Christian traditions mixed. Finally Elizabeth I decreed that they could be eaten, but only at Easter and Christmas. Thanks, Liz.

In the end, I decided not to make them. Not because of the religious controversy, but because they require yeast. Too much bother. I made a banana cream pie instead.

We decorated eggs, something the whole family can do to celebrate the season, no matter what each person believes.

Three men--one hookah

2007-04-08T09:47:00.000-04:00

I recently got back from what will probably be my last trip to Dubai in a while. While I didn't see much more than the conference hotel and a couple of nice restaurants, we did get one evening out by the Creek, as they call it, watching the dhows sail by while smoking a hookah pipe. (It's only apple-flavored tobacco, people.) I think I might pick one up at my local Syrian grocery in anticipation of hummus and baba ghanouj nights out on the patio.

Dungeons of suburbia

2007-04-08T09:36:00.000-04:00

When I went to iParty about a year or so ago and put my cartful of wigs, boas, hats and other performance accoutrements onto the checkout counter, the 17-year-old clerk looked at me with a catatonic, "I'd rather be texting my boyfriend" gaze and uttered in a deadpan tone, "So, you havin' a party or somethin'?" I inched closer, looked wide-eyed at her and stated, "I'm 40. I live in the suburbs. This is what we do." Needless to say, the rest of the transaction was conducted in an eerie silence.

Little did Miss Clerk know that all of this was just for innocent karaoke fun in my basement. Here's an action shot of Rebecca, Lauren, Koby, Jennifer, Jason and myself belting out Waterloo--always a crowd-pleaser, and with its own history lesson to boot.

Ski'd Row

2007-04-08T09:10:00.000-04:00

Yes, I know this is LATE. But things have been just a little busy this spring. We finally got a chance for a little R&R in late February--Lake Tahoe Style. Both Koby and I got on skis for the first time--at Squaw Valley, site of the 1960 Winter Olympics. Unfortunately I didn't get photos of Koby, but according to his instructor, Cat, Koby stayed out the longest of his Squaw Kids group.

Mic and I took a first-timer lesson, though he didn't need it (I did!). I think he was just trying to protect his body for the Boston Marathon. Ben and Anh are already experienced skiers, so they went their own way. After several falls and learning to contort my knees in a way I'm unaccustomed to, I was flying down the bunny slopes with the rest of the the ski-virgins.

When we weren't in the après-ski hottub at our little lakeside bungalow (luckily there are no pictures of this), we were eating, drinking and making merry. The second day we went to Mt. Rose ski resort--much easier and less overwhelming than Squaw, though it did have very strict rules (see photo).

Dennis didn't end up skiing, as he was getting over a nasty flu, but he did find a way to exercise nonetheless. Again and again and again.

Happy Year of the Pig

2007-01-28T05:32:00.000-05:00

Piggy is exactly how I feel after spending the majority of the month of January feeding from hotel buffets around the world. Like some kind of culinary Darwinism, buffet food always seems to be of moderate to low quality, while finer foods are only available in small portions. Despite my refined tastes, I find myself slopping at the trough with the rest of my corporate comrades, going from sales meeting to sales meeting like a troop of zombies whose only purpose is to eat, drink, and watch PowerPoint.

OK, so it's not all THAT bad. After coming home from our family trip to San Francisco, we had a few days to vacate the Christmas tree and its thousands of needles, followed by Koby's 4th birthday! We had friends over--mostly the brunch crew--and together feasted on Dora the Explorer cake. Koby made out like a bandit, as usual. It's tough having a birthday so close to Christmas. Maybe we'll start going light on the birthday and start celebrating his adoption day in August in a bigger way. Better balance.

Anyway, the day after, I headed off to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, for our Latin America sales meeting. I had only ever heard of Cabo as a port for the Love Boat in the 70s. Isolated and still relatively underdeveloped in the year 2007, I still prefer places where you actually get to see some of Mexico, rather than being holed up in a resort hotel far from civilization. Despite that, we had a productive meeting, and a little too much dancing most nights.

The trip home was nightmarish. Apparently ice storms in Dallas had crippled American Airlines flights around the world, but after 3 hours' sleep, my body trudged itself out to Cabo airport that Saturday morning, not knowing that, instead of getting home in 12 hours, it would take me 30 before I would reach Logan Airport, including a night's stay in the Chicago O'Hare Hilton. Oh well, it happens.

After the Latin America meeting of cerveza, pico de gallo and meringue, I soon found myself trading in my jalapeños for tiny but powerful Southeast Asian chilies in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. No dancing this time. Just lots of meetings, PowerPoint, food and drink, in the shadow of the world's 2nd tallest building, the Petronas Towers.

Did I mention the PowerPoint?

It was great being in my old "stomping grounds" of the Asia sales meeting, in the company of many familiar faces, and several new ones. I do miss it quite a bit, but I can confidently say that I wouldn't trade it for what I have now. That's therapy in action!

Then came one of the highlights of the month--my first trip to India. I only went to one place--Chennai (the former Madras), and only for 36 hours, unfortunately. But I still managed an Ayuvedic massage, 5 kilos of Southern Indian food under my belt, and some very productive work.

All this may never have come to pass, if I hadn't made it from the airport to the hotel, however. Riding in what seemed like a 1962 taxi with original fabric upholstery, my driver got stalled in the middle of a busy street, halfway to the hotel. First he stopped, got out, lifted the hood, and started tooling around with the battery connection (or something) with a screwdriver. A few failed attempts, 500 whizzing vehicles and 102 puffs of exhaust later, I saw my cabbie come back and reach into the front seat, and pull out a ROCK. With trusty rock in hand, he pounded on the battery again, but still no dice. The starter just wouldn't start. (By this time I started to suspect that this happened to this poor guy quite a lot.)

Eventually some friendly compatriots driving little things that look like Thai tuk-tuks got out and started pushing us. The driver popped the clutch, and soon we were off. Who wouldn't need an Ayurvedic massage after that?

Finally (yes, this does go on), I left Chennai for Singapore, where I spent two glorious days of email catch-up and otherwise relaxing with my best friend Christopher, his boyfriend Gabriel, and seeing other great friends like Peter, Joanne, Ronn and Melvin that I hadn't seen in a while.

I paused and considered Christopher's and my fortydom, as I reflected on a quote by Coco Chanel: "Nature gives you the face you have at twenty. Life shapes the face you have at thirty. But at fifty you get the face you deserve." Coco doesn't tell us what forty is about. But in any event, here we are.

Another 28 hours and three flights later, and I'm finally back at home. Bitter cold? Yes, but only on the outside.

Ho ho hold on tight!

2006-12-27T13:10:00.000-05:00

We've survived another Christmas! Actually, this one was less stressful in many ways than years previous. Maybe it's because there were so many life-altering events in the past 12 months that Christmas pales in comparison. Or maybe it's because we have a 3-year-old for whom Christmas is very "magical", and I got to re-direct my usual holiday angst toward making his experience a good one (which it was). Or maybe it's just the meds...

In any case, we are having a good time in California amongst Dennis's family (and my in-laws, as I can now say that LEGALLY). Koby got the Fisher Price digital camera for kids--apparently the hottest toy of the season, unbeknownst to me as I tried to purchase one in December. HA!

Anyway, we managed to get one through the foster care underground railroad, and he is thrilled. Other gifts of note include steering wheels, lots of CARS THE MOVIE stuff, and DVDs (Dora, Bob the Builder). Oh what fun, it is to... be a kid with a ton of doting relatives and friends.

Every Christmas Day I reflect on my previous time in Asia, and how (before I met Dennis) Christmas was generally not such a big deal. In Japan we had the Bo-nen-kai (forget-the-year parties, which sailed us into stupefication on a sea of alcohol and hot-pot dishes), and in Korea I had my share of parties with the students I taught. But one Christmas in Asia sticks out for me: 1994--the one I spent in Vietnam with my friend and roommate Brian Clark.

In one of the last bastions of Communism, Hanoi, we went to a local disco for a Christmas party. It was incredible. There were games, dancing, and booze. And all I really remember is dancing with uniformed police officers and watching a very Vietnamese-looking Kris Kringle throw goodies out to the crowd. He was dressed in black boots, a red bathrobe with white trim--a kind of hoodie, I think--and wearing a Ho Chi Minh-looking mask. He'll forever be known to me as Ho Ho Ho Chi Minh Santa.

Ah, how life has changed. So here's hoping that everyone had a great holiday, whatever you celebrate, and to a happy and healthy 2007.

A photo is worth 1,000 words (or 20,000 dollars)

2006-11-25T10:46:00.000-05:00

Yes, the first pics of the wedding are now available. These are shots taken by various family members during the event. We'll be offering a PRO upgrade once the photographer's works are ready for viewing. Just click here, or on the "Our family photo album" link on the right to check them out.

Sweet victory? or just Saccharine?

2006-11-10T08:36:00.000-05:00

Let's hope we don't end up with a bitter after-taste later, people. The media is heralding yesterday's Massachusetts Joint Session action (or delay of action) as a beacon of hope for gay marriage supporters. I certainly feel that way, but only time will tell.

Ben and I stood outside the Massachusetts Statehouse yesterday, along with a few hundred other activists, holding our placards and shouting our slogans, which included:
--Civil marriage, civil rights!
--Let the people marry!
--Separate church and state!
--They're honking for us; our cause is just!

...along with many verses of "This Little Light of Mine."

The other side, mostly composed of the 60+ crowd, held signs saying "Let the People Vote." While I can't deny that one's right to vote is a basic tenet of our Constitution, so is the notion of equal rights for all people. And civil rights are not a voting issue.

We far outnumbered the naysayers, which was even more evident as we sat in the Gardner Auditorium inside the Statehouse later that afternoon and watch live video feeds of the legislators as they made their case either for or against turning our future over to the people of Massachusetts. The sound of our applause versus theirs truly made me feel powerful, and on the side of the majority on the issue for the first time.

I wonder how many people on the "Let the People Vote" side were really FOR our marriages, but simply felt deprived of their constitutional right to help solidify our position through popular vote. Fewer than there are gay ballroom dance competitions at an AFA meeting, I'm sure.

So the Constitutional Convention will resume for its last session for this period on January 2. It's not expected that there will be a quorum present to vote on the amendment at this time. If this is the case, then the ballot initiative proposal is DEAD.

Rest in pieces.

Now my family and I can get back to being a family, and not living in a shadow of uncertainty about the status of our legal future... at least for now.

Deep breath

2006-11-08T19:27:00.000-05:00

Sorry for such a long hiatus. There are just a few things going on in my life at the moment: getting married Oct 29, where we hosted 100 people, 10% of which were staying in our home. It was great. Then Nov 7 came the elections, and thank god we got most of what we wanted. I couldn't have imagined a better wedding gift than seeing the Republicans exit the Massachusetts governor's spot, and waving bye-bye to Rick Santorum.

Having said that, all is not rosy. Tomorrow, Nov 9, is the Consitutional Convention, or ConCon, at the MA Statehouse, and one of the HOT topics is the vote on a proposed amendment that would ban same-sex marriage in the Commonwealth. Only 25% of participants (only 50 votes) have to support this tomorrow in order for it to move to a SECOND ConCon (next year), and if THAT passes as well, the amendment will go on the public ballot in 2008 to be voted on by THE PEOPLE. ARrrghhhh.

So tomorrow, after I drop Koby off at daycare, my friend Ben and I will head to the Statehouse. Watch this space for what I hope will be some interesting photos of people screaming at each other across the street.

And keep your fingers crossed. While I've read that even if all this back-stepping comes to its horrible end with a hate-mongering constitutional amendment, supposedly MY marriage is not in harm's way. It just means that no MORE same-sex couples can marry here in the future. Gee, great.

So the Commonwealth will allow two men to adopt a child, but not have the legal protection of marriage while they're raising that child?

PLEASE. CURB YOUR DOGMA.

Leaf-peeping Tom, Dick and Harry

2006-10-18T09:54:00.000-04:00

We braved the 0˚C overnight temps in the mountains near Stowe, Vermont. What lengths we won't go to for some quality leaf-peeping!

Koby got his chance on the tractor (Rebekah and Ben in Ohio, take note!).

Dennis got to show off his skill with the udders.

And I made a pilgrimage back to Huntington, Vermont, where I spent several months during my 8th grade year. Hadn't been here since 1979. Many things are the same, but the old Rustler's Roost is now a boarded up mess owned by some restaurateur from Burlington.

Two Libras hanging in the balance

2006-10-04T22:32:00.000-04:00

Rebecca and Dennis turned 40 on Sunday and Monday, respectively.

We celebrated by drinking until we knew all the correct answers to the 80s game.

Back from the Southwest

2006-09-24T08:54:00.000-04:00

We had a GREAT vacation. A quick review of the highlights of our whirlwind tour:

LAS VEGAS STRIP
A jewelry box full of rhinestones that someone has turned into an ashtray. A kaleidoscope of big hair, airbrushed, tight faces and fake boobs, together with oxygen-tank-sucking octogenarians with fingers planted firmly on the slot machine buttons.

We saw Zumanity by Cirque du Soleil. Well-done? Yes. Bawdy? Absolutely. Sexual? Slightly. Risqué? Not really. Unless you consider boobies and dirty jokes risqué. No gimps were harmed in the making of this show.

ROUTE 66
Stopped for lunch at the Road Kill Cafe in Seligman, Arizona. Their slogan--You Kill It, We Grill It. Not a vegetarian haven--even the grilled cheese sandwich was made with lard. Thank god for the salad bar.

GRAND CANYON
Absolutely grand, indeed. The early pioneers must have struggled to get here. We struggled ourselves with the brand of tourist attracted to the Grand Canyon Railway tour we took. Despite the bitchy, crochety old people on the train and the ADD-afflicted tour bus driver who told us more about herself than about the Canyon, the big hole in the ground was very impressive. I had had enough of the cheesy hotel brunch by the end of this bit of the trip. My advice? Skip the tour and do it on your own. The cowboy crooning on the train made me understand why so many were scalped back in the day.

SEDONA, ARIZONA
Although hyped up as over-touristy and overpriced, this was the highlight of our trip. We took a "Pink Jeep Tour", which had us bouncing over red rock formations and nearly knocked the chimichanga right out of me. You can go on meditation field trips to "magnetic vortices", and shop at the Metaphysical Supermarket. It's no wonder real estate prices here have skyrocketed.

BRYCE CANYON
After a long drive through Navajo country into Utah, we spent a day at Bryce, full of its famous hoodoo rock formations. Gorge-ous.

ZION NATIONAL PARK
Stayed at the Pioneer Lodge Motel, which was much better than expected. Good food, great views, easy access to tacky souvenirs and a free shuttle into the park. The park itself was wondrous, and I'd like to go back when I can hike some of it.

It was a great trip overall, bookended by some of the most breathtaking views I've ever seen in America on one side, and some of the nastiest tourists I've seen on the other. Like all places, the good and the bad intermingle, but in the end, it was an unforgettable experience, and introduced me to places I'd like to go back to again and again.

Check out our family album for more pics.

Ignorance by any other name...

2006-09-05T19:19:00.000-04:00

I couldn't resist bringing this 1996 article by Eric Zorn from the Chicago Tribune straight over to my blog from another. I am not surprised by its existence--more frightened by the short-sightedness of individuals in today's world of sound-byte news, so easily forgetting recent history.

The article:

-----------------------------------------
MARRIAGE ISSUE JUST AS PLAIN AS BLACK AND WHITE
5-19-96

Statement No. 1: Same-sex marriage must be forbidden, said the Republican senator from Wisconsin, "simply because natural instinct revolts at it as wrong." No. 2. An organization opposed to gay marriage claimed legalizing them would result in "a degraded and ignoble population incapable of moral and intellectual development," and rested this belief on the "natural superiority with which God (has) ennobled heterosexuals."

No. 3. "I believe that the tendency to classify all persons who oppose gay marriage as 'prejudiced' is in itself a prejudice," grumped a noted psychologist. "Nothing of any significance is gained by such a marriage."

No. 4. A U.S. representative from Georgia declared that allowing gay marriages "necessarily involves (the) degradation" of conventional marriage, an institution that "deserves admiration rather than execration."

No. 5. "The next step will be that gays and lesbians will demand a law allowing them, without restraint, to . . . have free and unrestrained social intercourse with your unmarried sons and daughters," warned a Kentucky congressman. "It is bound to come to that. There is no disguising the fact. And the sooner the alarm is given and the people take heed, the better it will be for our civilization."

No. 6. "When people of the same sex marry, they cannot possibly have any progeny," wrote an appeals judge in a Missouri case. "And such a fact sufficiently justifies those laws which forbid their marriages."

No 7. Same-sex marriages are "abominable," according to Virginia law. If allowed, they would "pollute" America.

No 8. In denying the appeal of a same-sex couple that had tried unsuccessfully to marry, a Georgia court wrote that such unions are "not only unnatural, but . . . always productive of deplorable results," such as increased effeminate behavior in the population. "They are productive of evil, and evil only, without any corresponding good . . . (in accordance with) the God of nature."

No. 9. A gay marriage ban is not discriminatory, reasoned a Republican congressman from Illinois, because it "applies equally to men and women."

No. 10. Attorneys for the state of Tennessee argued that such unions should be illegal because they are "distasteful to our people and unfit to produce the human race. . . ." The state supreme court agreed, declaring gay marriages would be "a calamity full of the saddest and gloomiest portent to the generations that are to come after us."

No. 11. Lawyers for California insisted that a ban on same-sex marriage is necessary to prevent "traditional marriage from being contaminated by the recognition of relationships that are physically and mentally inferior. . . . (and entered into by) the dregs of society."

No. 12. "The law concerning marriages is to be construed and understood in relation to those persons only to whom that law relates," thundered a Virginia judge in response to a challenge to that state's non-recognition of same-sex unions. "And not," he continued, "to a class of persons clearly not within the idea of the legislature when contemplating the subject of marriage."

To sum up: Legal recognition of such marriages would offend tradition, God, the sensibilities of the majority and the natural order while threatening conventional marriage, children and the future of our civilization.

The quotes are culled from a Boston University Law Review article and a brief filed with the U.S. Supreme Court, though I did take the minor liberty of changing the subject of the strangled rage, fear and righteous indignation.

Everywhere I quoted the speakers referring to same-sex marriage, homosexuality and heterosexuality, they were actually referring to interracial marriage and their views of black people, white people and the proper interaction thereof. And yes, that includes statement No. 6, which in original form articulated the old white supremacist belief that offspring of whites and blacks were--like mules that result when horses mate with donkeys--sterile.

The quotes date from 1823 to 1964 and, though the sentiments look hatefully ridiculous to us in 1996, they had sufficient appeal and staying power that 15 states still criminalized black-white marriage until the U.S. Supreme Court unanimously overturned those laws in the appropriately named 1967 case, Loving vs. Virginia.

Those whose unaltered words today resemble statements 1 through 12 above, take note. The stench is familiar. The future is listening.

-----------------------------------------

Heaven help us.

For the wonder of it all

2006-09-04T08:32:00.000-04:00

We went to Foxwoods Casino and Resort yesterday. It's only an hour and a half from Boston, but for some reason we hadn't made it there yet. And at the age of 39, it was my first official casino visit, believe it or not. I saw every cliche known to casino lore there--grandmas and grandpas in wheelchairs and pushing walkers. The only thing I didn't see was someone with an oxygen tank, although I almost needed one myself from all the smoke.

Is this what Vegas looks like? Yes, Dennis assures me, this is a small taste-test of what to expect Sept 16-17 when we're out west. I think we'll take Koby to Circus Circus for the shows, which should be marginally more entertaining than watching the various octogenarians doing a bicep workout on the slot machines.

And baby makes three... FINALLY

2006-08-24T16:31:00.000-04:00

We've been waiting for it for 503 days. That's how long it's been since we met Koby.

Now he's ours, forever and ever.

God save the great Commonwealth of Massachusetts.

Estate of panic

2006-08-17T11:21:00.000-04:00

Well, let's hope not, anyway. This is where we're aiming to hold the ceremony and reception--the Henderson House in oh-so-posh Weston, Massachusetts. God bless the Bay State and its lovely English manors.

Two boys tying the knot--and not for a merit badge

2006-08-13T07:33:00.000-04:00

Now that Dennis has his green card, we can FINALLY plan our wedding. We've been together for 10 1/2 years, so it's not like I have the jittery thrill of a woman who's been thumbing through Bride magazine since she was 7 years old. But I do want the legal recognition, that's for sure. And the fact that I get to do it with a big party in front of my family and friends is a big bonus.

Within 48 hours I was able to scout a potential location--I think that's the hard part. We're going in for interviews with the catering staff, etc., next week. Why some people spend 10 months (or more!) planning these things is still a puzzle to me. We've got 10 weeks, and between now and then I'll be traveling to London, Athens, Las Vegas, Mexico City, Guadalajara, and the Brazilian Amazon, but strangely I don't feel stressed--YET.

Since marriage became legal in Massachusetts in May 2004, over 8000 couples have wed. Yet strangely, we never got invited to any of those, so we're having to wing it. There are officiants you can hire (we're doing this without a wedding planner, though I suppose I could rent that film), who can help you design a ceremony that fits your lifestyle and works in various bits from your own cultural background. I wonder if I can find someone to put together a Filipino-Mennonite-Gay-Catholic-Buddhist wedding service. I'm open to suggestions...

What we HAVE decided is that we're going to wear our traditional Filipino barongs. My next quest--a cake topper that features two men--one white, one Asian--dressed in barong tagalog. I love a challenge.

No rabbit's foot required

2006-08-13T07:24:00.000-04:00

It's been quite a week. What can I say? On Aug 7:

1. We found out that we can adopt Koby officially Aug 24.

2. Dennis got his green card (he's only been in process since 1994).

3. I got a raise at work.

I'm going to start buying lottery tickets every Aug 7 from now on.

Peaches are not the only fruit

2006-08-06T21:11:00.000-04:00

Perry McGuire. Related to the "show-me-the-money" guy from that Tom Cruise movie? No. He's a Georgia Republican running for Attorney General. Now, Georgia is many miles away from me, and why should I care? My fondest memory of Georgia was a night at Blake's (in Atlanta) in 1992, where I got to watch a bunch of draq queens SING (and not lipsynch) gospel music during their Sunday evening "service." Mixing those sounds with the image of huge sweaty singers, and 200 queers waving cocktail napkins back and forth in unison was as close to organized religion as I wanted to get in the 90s.

Now enter Perry. According to his bio, number one on his mission statement is to "Hunt down and prosecute sexual predators to better protect Georgia’s children and families." I guess that's what he had in mind when he recently stated that he was disappointed with a Georgia state court ruling that a GSA (gay-straight alliance) could continue to meet in a high school in Cleveland, Georgia.

Agape Press, the journalist arm of the AFA, reports:

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McGuire, a former corporate attorney and one-time state senator, feels the court's ruling in this case has turned the Equal Access Act on its head. "I think the problem here, and I think where the court substantially erred, is that the intent of the Act was never to allow organizations that advocate illegal activity [to have campus access]," he says. "And in Georgia, sex between minors is illegal; statutory rape laws apply."

GSAs and their ilk should be denied access to school campuses, the AG candidate says, because they promote activities that are against the law. Allowing such groups is "much like allowing a pedophile club or a gambling club to meet at school," he contends.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh, I can feel the love, Perry. Now if you're REALLY serious about this, you should try to ban Future Farmers of America (they might grow some illegal herbs), the Debate team (treasonous arguments could erupt), the Foreign Language Club (they erode the legitimacy of English as a superior and required language for all Americans), and all sports teams which feature a cheerleading squad at their games (for obvious reasons) or which require same-sex showers after practice (I'll refrain from giving you a visual).

People For the American Way Deputy Legal Director Judith E. Schaeffer condemned McGuire’s comments.

-------------------------------------------------------------------
“Gay-straight alliances exist to create safe, supportive environments for gay and lesbian students who all too often are victims of bullying and discrimination, to combat harassment and discrimination, and to provide information. To suggest that they exist to advocate illegal activity is just plain wrong. It’s an attempt to appeal to bigotry and exploit Georgia teens for political gain,” Schaeffer said.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

So if you live in Georgia, or know someone who does, please drop a note, and tell them to use their vote.

10 reasons why gay marriage should be illegal

2006-08-02T22:04:00.000-04:00

I found this on a UK-based blog, but it comes to us via a craigslist user in Portland, OR...

01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

03) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

04) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

06) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

08) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

Re-post this if you believe love makes a marriage.

Know thy neighbor indeed

2006-07-29T19:08:00.000-04:00

Here's a website I just heard about today from a nice couple we met last week--Dennis and Jim. They have a little boy named Joshua who is exactly Koby's age. We sat around and ate lunch, talked about potty training and daycare while the kids frolicked in the inflatable pool. Anyway, check out this site.

KnowThyNeighbor.org is a grassroots, non-profit organization promoting dialogue on marriage equality in Massachusetts and advocating for the removal of governmental barriers to public information by providing meaningful access online.

If you can read this

2006-07-29T08:18:00.000-04:00

日本語でもできるのか？これが読めたらお返事くださいね。

I said "cheese," not "cheesy"

2006-07-28T19:24:00.000-04:00

We had had as much as we could by this point. It was time to go home.

No sight of Jake or Heath

2006-07-28T19:21:00.000-04:00

Dining at the Brokeback Mountain cafe

Just like riding a bike

2006-07-28T19:19:00.000-04:00

My brother will be so proud to see me on a bike, even if I do look more like Suburban Hausfrau than Speed Racer.

Survivor: Freeport, Maine

2006-07-28T19:13:00.000-04:00

Damn the rain! OK, everybody to their positions. Tarp? Check. Big pink umbrella? Check.

Baby on Board--and he's driving

2006-07-28T16:45:00.000-04:00

Only 13 more years, little man...

No love lost with the AFA

2006-07-28T16:08:00.000-04:00

Believe it or not, the following is copied verbatim from the American Family Association website:
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Does AFA Hate Homosexuals?
Absolutely Not! The same Holy Bible that calls us to reject sin, calls us to love our neighbor. It is that love that motivates us to expose the misrepresentation of the radical homosexual agenda and stop its spread though our culture. AFA has sponsored several events reaching out to homosexuals and letting them know there is love and healing at the Cross of Christ.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Radical? Agenda? Indeed! If we are radical, the AFA is certainly more so. The AFA, along with many other right-wing organizations using religion as their recruitment platform, is waging war against "Our Agenda." What is the agenda, you ask? Well, here it is. Get on your workboots, Myrtle. It's going to be a long day.

6:00 am Gym
8:00 am Breakfast (oatmeal and egg whites)
9:00 am Hair appointment
10:00 am Shopping
12:00 pm Brunch

2:00 pm
1) Assume complete control of the U.S. Federal, State and Local
Governments as well as all other national governments,
2) Recruit all straight youngsters to our debauched lifestyle,
3) Destroy all healthy heterosexual marriages,
4) Replace all school counselors in grades K-12 with agents of Colombian
and Jamaican drug cartels,
5) Establish planetary chain of "homo breeding gulags" where over-medicated, imprisoned straight women are turned into artificially impregnated baby factories to produce prepubescent love slaves for our devotedly pederastic gay leadership,
6) bulldoze all houses of worship, and
7) Secure total control of the INTERNET and all mass media for the
exclusive use of child pornographers.

2:30 pm Get forty winks of beauty rest to prevent facial wrinkles from
stress of world conquest
4:00 pm Cocktails
6:00 pm Light Dinner (soup, salad, with Chardonnay)
8:00 pm Theater
11:00 pm Bed

So, I guess I should comfort in the fact that the AFA "loves" me so much. It just doesn't love my family.

Be careful of the horns

2006-07-28T15:01:00.000-04:00

This won't make the green card come any faster, Dennis.

Finally, the drapes match the carpet

2006-07-28T14:57:00.000-04:00

I've seen Christopher with every hairstyle known to man or beast (literally). But this one takes the cake. Seriously, though, it's for a good cause (I should hope so!). Check out this link to make a donation.

Camping is not just about being campy

2006-07-28T14:43:00.000-04:00

Why is everyone in Boston so surprised that I know how to camp?